you have a little bird named dude.
three things i know : she's yellow-hued,
she eats bird food,
and i'm fairly certain she's the best of her brood.
but on the day she debuted,
some trouble ensued:
you suspected that dude... wasn't so shrewd.
it wasn't just that her mood was subdued...
you said you had viewed
that she had eschewed
the food you thought to include.
... and i must conclude
dude must have construed
that the food was not meant to be chewed.

you weren't trying to delude
her by providing false food
which would surely be rude
and you'd prob'ly get booed
by the PETA group, who'd
start a big feud, then you'd
no doubt get sued.
and you'd be royally screwed.
indeed, a bad fate to elude.

so a goal you pursued
and a scheme you brewed.
in front of the food, dude - you glued.
and she looked and reviewed
and slowly was clued in and cued.
for you meant to allude
that it was actual food.
and lo, dude was wooed!
her faith was renewed
appetite endued
and she was no prude
when it came to eating up food

so you left her, put pants on, got shoe'd
went and saw your friend jude
hiked, fished, frisbee'd, canoed,
got your tongue pierced and your forehead tattooed,
came back, took a shower, shampooed
then checked up on dude
by the way, you were nude
(sorry for making this lewd)
and you looked over at dude
meaning not to intrude
and thought "my vision is skewed!"
you saw her belly protrude
and her mass had accrued
the site was vulgar and crude.
she'd kept eating her food!
you watched her eat and eat and eat ...
...till she spewed!


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